Life's A Glitch Marvel vs Capcom 2 Stupid Files
by Punishment Prez
Summary: A dumb collection of glitches, stories, and mishaps that my feeble mind came up with. Some are true. Contains yuri, yaoi, and a whole lot of expletives. Wanna join?
1. Segment 1: Snuggly Jin!

?!: Title?

Strider:...Why am I here?

?!: He talks? It's a miracle!

Roll: Of Course the funny man talks. Just a minute ago, he was saying what a bitch you are...Megaman, what's a "bitch"?

Megaman: Now Roll, the Professor Light wouldn't want you saying that word...It's very bad...glares at Strider

?!: My heart breaks...Anyhoo! Megaman came up with the title hurray!

Megaman: Marvel vs Capcom- The Glitch Chronicles

Roll: Snuggly Jin!

Strider: ...I hate you all!!

?!: whispering exceptforjinsaotomeapparently...

Strider: WHAT DID YOU SAY blushy

?!: Nothing...

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**Glitch Segment 1:** **_Snuggly Jin_!**

For some odd reason, Marvel superheroe, Spiderman decided to team up with the outrageous robot controlling-loud mouth guy Jin Saotome. (wtf was I thinking when I was playing..) Pay attention, their fourth match of the day was about to start.

Guile didn't understand why he always ended up with the weirdos, but if it was to protect the kid (Chun-Li) he'd pair up with a million weirdos...Even if it was the all too amorous Dan Hibiki.

"Spiderman? Hey, is this an expedition match, or..." Guile asked the young man in his striped suit. "I have no idea why, we're fighting, but...Let's make this a good live huh?" Spider-man suggested. Jin said nothing, he only eyed his opponents like a hungry newborn female hyena, and let me tell you, that's scary even to me! But the ever loving Dan just gave the two of them a cute stance and wave, almost feminine. (If you notice, most of his clothes are like that...) "Hi, I'm new." He gave an anime-like girl laugh. (Whoa, I think his intro is like Chun Li's xD)

"So I see, hello!" said the man in spider clothes. He was squinting at his shocking hot pink gi. And Dan, was of course, eyeing...Jin Saotome, with his tight pants...Almost leering creepily. Guile sighed, but before he could say another word-

FIGHT!!

Spider man, being the most nimble, made the first move,"Spider Sting!" he gave Guile an uplifting uppercut followed by a 4-hit combo. "Owie," said the large man. He did a quick recovery roll. "Try this! Sonic Hurricane!!" effectively knocking the other man to the ground. "Wow, you're coming for Charlie aren't you? If you don't hook up with a gal soon, people will start to wonder..." Spidey commented slyly.

"Huh!?" The machoman's face went light red.

"Too slow! Maximum Spider!" He went into his super burst mode, attacking the army man like no tommorrow! Guile's health was really depleted by this time. "Ha, uhhh, you are so cruel Parker...Damn..." Guile told Peter while running out of breath. "Well, maybe, if I just hook you up with the man, you would stop blushing everytime I-" He stopped when he actually noticed Guile blushed when he called Charlie's name.

"Ohhh, heh heh heh. Charlie!" He went to try Guile with a round house. "No way! Sonic Boom!" Thinking on his feet, Guile started to play Spiderman's game. "Hey Miss Black Cat! Spidey wanted you to know how hot you're looking today, and he was wonder later on could you guys make a web in an alley and-"

"**_ULTIMATE WEB THROW_**!!"

You couldn't tell by looking, but the photographer's voice showed that what Guile said was very true.

And of corse Guile was knocked out after the impact. The so called heroe rushed over to the sleeping man, with evil intent.

"Hey Spidey," called the vixen Black Cat. "Hold on a sec,"

"Guile, it's me Charlie...Won't you come over, just a little closer? I won't hurt you baby, unless you won't me _to_..." He gave a seductive chuckle a predator might use, scary...

"Hmmm, okay, let me grab my bad waffle from Kid..."

Peter almost burst out laughing in his ear, but he wasn't done yet.

"Shh, I have all the waffles you'll ever need, just come with me...I need you..." He let his voice fade out to something less than a whisper, while running a finger down the sleeping man's cheek. He walked over to his partner Cat before bursting out into a fit with her. "Spidey! Stop, this is serious now! Ha ha! Jin-Jin" "Likes bad waffles too!" Spiderman wasn't helping at all. "No! Ever since the match started, him and that Dan guy disappeared, sounded like I heard a call for help over there..." She pointed to the right direction of the 2D screen.

"Aww Shonen!" This entire time, he didn't realize that there weren't any other fight sounds, how did he not notice? They walked over to the extreme right of the screen. "Damn, we can't go any father...Jeez, guess we gotta wait now..." Black Cat sighed. "Well, we do have 69 seconds left...We could..."

One minute later (lol)...

"I can't do what I want in one minute Kit Cat."

"Aww man!" She began to go back to her assist spot.

"Don't worry, any second now...We'll just call it a day...And then-"

TIME'S UP!!

Black Cat and Spiderman waited for a moment...Then a few more moments...

"Hey! Saotome! Hibiki, where ARE you guys?" Spidey yelled out."Charlie gimme backmymallsmileyundies..." Guile drabbled off in his sleep. As if on cue, Jin jumped onto the screen, with his victory pose. The only difference was that-

"And one for-What the hell!" Spiderman's senses told him to look at Jin before posing for his camera shot. And damn you if Dan Hibiki wasn't snuggling on Jin. Jin's face was stuck in his victory yell, but all you could hear was "Ta-Tashkitou...(I think that means, 'save me')

"Couldn't you save that for later! Jeez, this entire time!" Dan was still on the smaller man's shoulder, in the crook of his neck...

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?!: That glitch actually happened with the whole Dan on-top of Jin thing, I was so mad because I barely beat Guile!

Dan: But he's so comfy! cuddlies Jin

Striderz; Grrr...Evil Hiryu Death Glare ho!

Jin: It's not my fault! Get off meeeee!

?!: Hmmm, leme try! cuddlie yay! Wow he is!! Kyaaa!

Dan: Toldya! Kyuuuu!

Strider: THAT'S IT!! **_Legion_**!!

?! and Dan: Aww puppies!!

OWIEEEE!!

Jin: Oro? Droooo...gets hauled off

Strider: Mine **DAMMIT**!! And they _aren't_ puppies!

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	2. Segment 2: Morrigan's Pussy

?!: Segment 2...Already!

?!: Where is everybody...I wanna talk, hello? Somebody's gotta name this...

Sakura: Beowulf!!

?!: Otay...I don't think that name's gonna fit...

Wolverine: One plus one is two...One plus one is two...

?!: No, unh unh.

Storm: Hey! Two plus two equals CHICKEN!!

Ken: Ohhh! I know!

?!: Okay, as long as it has nothing to do with Ryu, yaoi, yuri, hentai, and no; relish is not an instrument, as well as mayonaisse.

Ken: Awww! sits down in the Dunce Corner

Ryu: How 'bout Morrigan's Pussy?

?!: You-you genius!! Thank you, for once I'm not going to pound on you relentlessly...

Sakura: I always thought that was Ken's job...

?!: That can only go one way, cause Ryu can beat Ken's .

Ken: Pretty-boy Pout

Storm and Wolverine: What about chicken...?

Ryu,Sakura and ?!: NO chicken!!

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**Segment 2**: _Morrigan's Pussy!_

"Morrigan, as a student in the Kanto Region of Japan, my mission today is to teach you how to be good for the safety of all!" Sakura Kasugano said triumphantly. "How do you know me? We're in Japan? And what does I gots to do with youse?" asked the sexy succubus Morrigan, though she had a point that the plot sucks already.

"From Ken and Ryu."

"And how did you find me?"

"I heard you were in the forest area..."

"Okay...And what color underwear am I wearing?"

"Victoria Secret, black...With a matching bra, lined with red."

/I have got to stop sleeping around.../ "Okay, Sakura, so you are going to give me your good powers, so I just take off my clothes now right?"

"No! Good people don't strip down to their clothes like that!"

"Ohhh...This is hard...But it's kinda hot, so now can I expletive you?" /Wow, this is some challenge, I wonder what those two pricks are doing now I'm gone../

"Ken, take it out! Please! I think it's starting to bu-"

"Just a little longer, I'm coming Ryu...Just wait one more minute, I promise..."

"But-"

"Shhh..."

Ryu just continued to moan...And then (lol again)

Ding!

"Ahhh!" Ken cried out. "See, I told you Ryu baby!" He pulled 'it' out.

"Ohh, Ken!" Ryu mewled.

"It's perfect! It's all golden brown and I want a piece now!"

"You really like my pie?" Ken asked Ryu innocently. "Hell yeah! I want your cherry pie!" "Well, there's a price that comes with it... I have to have some of your pie Ryu..." (sexual seduction...)

"I ain't gots no pie Ken-sama" /Did I just say 'Ken-sama'?/ "As dense as ever, Ryu..." Ken thought out loud. But not for long...

"Okay that was disturbing and hot at the same time...As I was saying Morrigan, lesson number one... Oh! Hello Officer Valentine!"

S.T.A.R.S. Liutenant Jill Valentine arrived upon the scene, holding a little white kitty with vivid blue eyes. "Hi Sakura, so might I ask why are you in the forest with Morrigan...alone..." Jill asked protectively. Morrigan was even worse than Cammy...Cammy, she could be anywhere near her. Jill would rather take on a hundred Undeads than Cammy...

"Oh, yeah well, Ken and Ryu sent me on a training job with Morrigan, so now you have a kitty Miss Jill?" "No, as a matter of fact, Morrigan, this is your kitten...I came to give her back to you..."

"What, I don't have a cat..."

"Isn't your name Morrigan X?"

"I don't know about the X part..."

"The idiot author put it there because she's lazy, now isn't this your name, residence and home phone number on this cat's name plate?" Jill asked, bringing the milky cat over. The name plate's design had a torture device and bats all over it.

"Yep."

"And you did make this name plate?"

"Yep."

"So, you put yor information on this cat, therefore, this cat, whose name is-"

"Felicia."

"Should be yours."

"That makes sense to me," Morrigan commented.

"Then take her..." The kitten issued a 'mrw' when Jill pushed her against Morrigan.

"But it's not my pussy!"

"That's it!!" Jill rushed over towards Morrigan, and in the process, the cat jumped out of her arms. Suddenly, the cat turned into a very sexy barely clothed (if that ooh la la la!) brown-skinned woman, with outrageously thick blue Sonic-style hair. "Eh!" She squeaked like Kirby. Jill and Sakura just looked at her with their jaws dropped. "She-she-she's a WOMAN!!" Jill broke out. "ZOMG, I wanna take her home!! Kyaaa!!" Sakura yelled and ran over to the catwoman. She started petting her on the head. "Aww, she's purring!" Sakura squealed.

Felicia ran over to Morrigan and tackled her playfully, knocking her to the ground. lick lick "See, she knows you, dammit Morrigan, you can't put people on leashes like animals!" She plucked Felicia off of the sultry woman. "Come on, we gotta find you a home," Jill started off in the opposite direction carrying the woman, well, like a pet.

"Yahhh..." Felicia meowed. Once agian, she rushed over to Morrigan, moving in and between her legs."You liar! This oughta teach ya, you bat slut!" She summoned out her grenade launcher, oh yeah; the big one." "Hmph, military dog!" She prepared her super attack, Eternal Slumber! But Sakura jumped in the middle.

"No Morrigan, you forced me to do this,"

"How the hell is a remote gonna stop me, Foolish child!"

Sakura pushed the main button on the remote. "Huh Ahhhhhhhh!!" Morrigan plopped on the ground and started writhing in the grass. She started yelling uncontrollably.

"YES YES YES Presssitagainnnnn do it, do it, Sakuraaa do it hardderrr!!"

"What in Leon's name did you do to her?" Jill questioned astonished. "Well, Megaman's and Roll's professor told me to put the Action Bastard Rod in her and press the button on this control, wait, he told me to record it..." She began to pull out a camcorder from her bookbag. "And he said it will help keep her 'good'."

"So I see. Hey, Sakura, you wouldn't mind me watching, do you?" (Jill!) "No, what about Felicia?" Who was oblivious because she was toying with a rat. "She'll be fine..."

"Works for me! I ain't going to the dojo today for nuthin'"

"Why not? Ken and Ryu are pervy sages?" Jill asked.

"Sorta complicated...Oh look! Morrigan looks like she becoming 'good'!" "Hey, why won't you go see, if she needs you Sakura? I'm sure those clothes might be uncomfortable on her, she might won't you to help take them off..."

"Awesome! What a great idea Miss Jill!"

/I am so awesome...Yuri in the palm of my hands, next, yaoi.../

Sexual Harassment Zombie Chuckle ho!

"Ohh Felicia, I know a certain kitty kitty whose sleeping with mommy Jill tonight..."

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?!: Jill and Ken are Sexual Harassment Pandas.

Jill and Ken: She lie! Kill her!

Sakura and Ryu: Why?

Jill: 'Cuz she said she was going to eat your pie and you guys won't have dessert!

Ken: You guys love dessert, right?

Sakura and Ryu: teary-eyed PIE!!

Ryu: Evil Ryu-**Tatsu Maki Senpuu Kyaku!**

Sakura: **Sakura Otoshi!!**

?!: Felicia, Kitty Litter...

Felicia: Yah!!

Everyone else: **Dammit **FELICIA!!

?!: By the way, this was based off of a glitch as well, except after Felicia stopped flying into us (Jill and Morrigan) she stayed on the ceiling, so, yeah...

Felicia: I believe I can fly... sails into air

Ken: I believe she can touch the sky.

Morrigan: I think about it every night and day.

Ryu: I used to think that I could not go on.

Sakura: Damn, I'm sayin though, why you sung the wrong part Ryu!


	3. Segment 3: Versus! Men in the Mirror!

?!: Aloha-wiki!

Chun Li: What now psycho bitch?

Iceman: You're supposed to have an asterisk instead of the 'i'

Omega: How 'bout I whip you into shape? Creep Leer of Perverted Lust Ho!

Captain Commando (C2): Hey ngga, you betta not call me C2 or I swear...

?!: ?!

Iceman: What in the gods are you saying!

Chun Li: Somehow, she always ingeniousely ties our conversations...

C2: ...In with every story in some crude attempt of...humor, or plot structure...

Omega: I'm going to whip someone before I go home tonight.

...' everyone turns to Iceman lolz

Iceman: What're you looking at. Omega starts toward him

Omega: It's okay son, I'm a doctor.

Chun Li: What movie did that come from C2?

C2: Grrrrr...

?!: Everyone's a critic...And this has nothing to do with the title this time.

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Segment 4: Vesus the Men in the Mirror!

Strider was tired of being in fanfictions, especially random ones, especially especially when it invovled long sentences, crack pairings, and R. Kelly, though he didn't know why.

He looked over at his partner (quite random) Jin Saotome.Your damn right he had a crush on him, and it's both funny and hot so shut up!

They had already gone through two matches, and he was getting antsy waiting on the next two fighters. What's worse, the author had changed the original soundtrack for the valley board with a mix of other songs.

No. Taste.

"What the hell is taking them! I'm ready to kick some ," blurted the headstrong fighter Jin. I used to hate him, Ryu and Cyclops, but now it's just Iceman (Definition:dipshit retard with ice powers.)

Hiryu (how do you pronounce the emo's name?) was glad his pink scarf coverd his face, for he blushed madly (awww!). Then their new theme music for the Blue Moon board started.

Shimmering, so bright.

Got a light, divine.

Flow along, the sea,

of fading stardust... clicky noise

"Hey!" It wasn't very often Strider lost his cool, but he was vibing to that song. "Strider buddy, you okay? I know, you are sexually frusterated? That happens to everyone except Morrigan." He pated the man lightly on his black robey shirt, a little rubby like though, and too soft for his nature. He, almost losing himself, let his hand fall on the small of the other's back.It was quickly removed (dammit!) but not without a "look" from deep chocolate eyes**Blushy Blushy Peek of** **Innocence** Ho! "Don't know what youre talking-" clickety again

I'm startin with the man in the mirror!

I'm asking him to change his ways!

And no message cold've been any clever.

If you wanna make the world a better place,

Take a look at yourself and make the change!

The match was set as the two looked on shell-shocked

**Jin Saotome Jin Saotome**

**Strider Hiryu** _vs._ **Strider Hiryu**

Dude... How ironic is that!

"How the hell is that random" cursed Saotome. "And who the hell is dressed as me!"

Anyway, the two other dopplegangers appeared on the scene.

The Strider we know was wearing pink and black (lol, Jin wearing all black, kawaii!), and Strider#2 (Hiryu) was wearing regular purple and red, but tanned. Jin#2(Saotome) wore all sky blue. Ha. Ha. Ha.

FIGHT!

"Die you fiend!" cried Hiryu slashing at Jin.

"Stay away from him ho!" yelled Strider aiming to pimp-slap his .

"It is a pleasure to meet me! How are you?" asked Saotome to Jin.

"Wtf? we're supposed to be fighting you Lemmiwinks1!"

"Very well then," he backed away,but all too quickly, Saotome burst forth with "Cyclone!" /Damn, how can he control that thing better than me?!/

Meanwhile, the two Striders stopped pimp-poking each other for a moment. That sat to look at the two Jins.

"You know, you aren't as talkative as me, but you're a perv as well." (thay're educated now) Hiryu said to Strider who only replied:" dotspacedotspacedot" He merely stood from their sitting position and went across Hiryu's head with enough force to drain nearly a quarter of total health.

"Ey! What the fck man!"

"Don't even think about what you don't know that I know've you'd thunk it."

"If that's even a word, that just made no sense."

"Don't look at Jin."

"What he's mine!" They started a little btch fight.

Back to the other two.

/Sht, can't believe my health is this low/ Jin glanced over at his health bar, yeah he was getting beat like he owed Saotome money. /Time for drastic measures./

"And next time, don't stare at my Jin like that," Strider whispered in Hiryu's ear after K.O ing him with a punch(pimp slap) square(circle) to the face(cheek).

"Owie," Hiryu sighed fakely and disappeared. But not a moment before Jin in Black hollered his battle cry, and all of his clothing (except boxers damn!) were removed from his body in flames. Even Saotome didn't have a nice word to say as the clothes pierced him like bullets. How it depleted his health so much is beyond me, I just play the game.

Shockkk.

Awkward Shocckkk.

What just happened Jin?

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?!: That was the first time I saw that move, no kidding, there was two Jins and Striders, but the song was Fantasia "Got Me Waiting"

Hiryu: Great googly moogly. jaw drops, nosebleed

Jin: Anbody saw the front part of my pants around here? everyone looks at Iceman

Iceman: Aww come on! Does it look like I have your pants part where your business been! For chrissakes, I like Rogue!

Omega: Hmmm circumspect. You liked getting whipped, didn't you?

Bonnie: Otayy, too much info, I'm out. steals my TV and leaves

C2: Wow, and I thought you was a good actor. stifled laugh

Chun Li: She could write a whole book...

Iceman: Screw you guys, I'm going home steals icecream from freezer

Hulk: I'm finding this hilarious! For once I'm not the object of attention.

?!: Y'all some basers bruh, at least the Hulk didn't steal-eh! The hell did my Devil May Cry 3 go, and my Playstation 2! And C2, what happened to the door, why is it burst through.

C2: That's it! I am not that girl from Code Geass!**Movie Slapstick Hitstick** Ho!

?!: Why am I always in pain...?

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	4. Segment 4: Servbot's Spicy Taco!

?!: Yo.

Hulk: That's it?

Gambit: I'm sayin' though...What are we here for again?

?!: A story! YAY!

Bonnie: ...I want money for this you little dipshit!!

?!: Ohh la la, feisty.

Hayato: Rhyms with spicy...

?!: That's it Kira, the perfect title.

Hulk: Servebot's Spicy Ass Taco!

Gambit: WTF!! What is going on!

Bonnie: She has porn in her room.

Gambit: runs into my room

?!: Get the hell outta there, my pornnnn...

Hayato: ...The hell is a "Kira"?

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**Segment 4****:** _Burn, Servbot's Spicy Ass Taco!_

"MeowMeowMeowMeow,

MeowMeowMeowMeow,

MeowMeowMeowMeowMeowMeowMeowMeow!"

"Would you please shut the fudge up!! GOD, you've been singing that damn catfood song forever!"

I love annoying people. Apparently, Sonson hates being annoyed. My turn btch.

Felicia stopped her singing for a minute. "Fur-get you! I'm practicing my vocals for tonight's show, you pile of monkey poo!" She licked her white fur and shook her fuscia hair around her shoulders. Sonson decided to let that one slide. "So, where are you singing at?"

Felicia's ears perked up. "Glad you asked. Morrigan and some weird cousin of hers named 'Kariya' got me a gig at the Cat Scratch Club.Wanna come?" her ocean eyes pleaded. "Why the hell not, but isn't that place in a song? Never mind, don't answer that."

They continued walking down the unknown street in New York, somehow, thay ended up on someplace where some odd spider was doing God-knows-what because webs were everywhere...eww. (The hell was Spider man doing?!)

Earlier that day...

"Oh Servbot, my little pride and joy! Where are you!"

Holy Shonen. It was Tron Bonne, and despite her name, there was nothing "good" about her. Today was her little Appreciation Day for all servbots, but she had sniffed out this particular one that was hiding from the horror.

"There you are! What are you doing hiding under the incinerator?(??) Come try one of my tacos before you run off with Blackheart, it'll give you good luck. Mr. Vergil said so..." Under that sweet smile, was a demonic glare, ready to destroy and give terrible heartburn...(Dramatic music: da da da duhhh!!) You know it's evil if it was from Vergil!!

"Oh yeah! Once we beat Servbot and that Blackheart, I'll be one step closer to that Dragonball! Goku, eat your heart out!" Sonson stated triumphantly. "What's a 'dragonball'?", Felicia wondered out loud.

"I think it's something to eat..."

#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#

"I always knew I could eat my heart! Oh boy, I wonder what it tastes like!"

Gohan walks in "Dad! The hell you think you're doing! Put your heart back in now!"

"Fudge you Gohan, next I'm gonna eat a Drag-"

drops on the floor dead

"Okay, so that's one of the dumb ways Dad died..."

#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#

A red shadowed Blackheart and army-green Servbot plogged (is that a word?) painfully up to Sonson and Felicia awaiting the battle start.

What the hell was wrong with them, thay were usually peppy!

**FIGHT NGGAS!!** (what if it really said that, i'll be rollin'!)

Sonson (cheating ) started out with her Ground Crawl, and uppercutted Blackheart, who was completely submissive. Felicia however waited for her tiny prey to attack first (who was even more of a cheater than Abyss).

He did not budge. Felicia gave him an adorable whap with her right paw.

Still nothing. "Mrw? What?"

Meanwhile, Blackheart was getting his face rearranged by Sonson's sharp claws. He fell to the floor with a simple "Uh!"

"Hey! Wake up! Your health is still full!" Sonson commanded. Blackheart mumbled something about he "didn't feel good", "damn taco", and "stop with the quotation marks".

Servbot, was just bent over clutching his stomach in pain.

Felicia gently padded Servbot on his head. "Yah!," she broke out playfully. No response, so Sonson 'tapped' him rough over the head. And this is what he said:

**"BWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!"**

Felicia joined. "I know that song! It's that Death Note opening isn't it? BWWWWAAAAAAHHHHH!!" "No, you litter for brains! Something is wrong with him? Servbot buddy?" But it was too late. The taco fumes knocked him out completely. How sad. Oh yeah and Blackheart as well.

Let it burn, let it burn gotta let

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?!: If you ever played the computer version of this, mine has weird bugs, one in particular is that when Blackheart dies first...

Hayato: The patner on his team usually yells for him, sometimes with their own yell!

Bonnie: All of you are lame anyway! Damn why am I still here!

?!: She loves us!

Gambit: Oh no she don't! She's the Witch of the Waste!

Hulk: This is not Howl's Moving Castle, and- Where did Bonnie go?

Hayato: Where's the T.V. And where did Gambit go?

Hulk: Hey your porn and the computer's gone as well.

?!:Shock! Ain't that a btch!!


	5. Rant Episode 1: Captain Love Flashback!

?!: Finally, I'm alone.

...

?!: Okay, I'm lonely!! Where is everyone?

...

?!: Fine! I'll just start The Rant Show!

...?

?!: "What is the Rant Show?" It's where you get to talk about everybody silly! Just join in if you want!

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**Rant Show Episode 1:** _Captains Love Flashback!_

_Intro_

Mom walks in Mom: What are you doing up so late? School tomorrow!

?!: Oh nuthin' we're just listening to some music and playing the game.

Mom: Ain't that the one you got from the library? Boy I wish we had Ratchet and Clank and Dark Cloud 2. What's this one?

?!: Marvel vs. Capcom 2, it's the M.U.G.E.N. version you see-

Mom: Uh-uh, I am not 'bout to bust my brain tryin' to understand your computer hacker limbo. Maybe next time...

Is that Captain America?

(Code Name: Luna) Luna: Yeah, and he cheats like I don't know what!! keeps trying to kill Captain America with Sonson

Mom: Who are you dear daughter (ain't tellin' you my name)?

?!: See the guy in blue tights? I'm him, Captain Commando. starts to get angry with Spiderman now

Long pause and keyboard buttons taping.

Mom: But ain't Captain America gay?

Luna and ?!:...BWAHAHAHAA!!

Mom: No, I'm serious, isn't he gay?

?!: Yeah, his boyfriend is Captain Commando!

Luna: They're having a lover's quarrel?! more laughter

Mom: I'm leavin'. See ya, 'cuz y'all is terrible. finally bursts out laughing and leaves

Luna: So what are they fighting about?

?!: Well, sombody wants to be 'captain' tonight..Sorry Capt. America, you're UKE TONIGHT!! finally k.o.ed the man

Luna: Wowwww. C2 really wanted to be seme to send him flying like that...

?!: "Victory!" my Capt. America, that's what C2'S gonna be sayin' tonight!

_End Intro_

Captain America: I'll have you know that that is not in the least bit true.

?!: You're not saying it's false either.

C2: I told you to stop calling me that-Never mind. This would have been funny if you didn't invovle me.

?!: None of you admitted it was false yet.

Capt. A: How can you sit there with a straight face and lie!

?!: Are you trying to prove this to yourselves, or the reader because you damn sure can't change my mind.

C2: What must I do to prove...?

?!: Nothing. It goes by the rules of the Creator Note.

C2 and Capt. A: ...

?!: Anyway, what's the deal with you two? For most superheroes who swear they aren't gay, you people sure do wear a lot of tights.stares at C2

C2: STOP UNDRESSING ME WITH YOUR EYES!!

Capt. A: Beacause it is light and durable, that's why!!

?!: cough bullsht! cough bullsht!

?!: Why do you guys have the same color costume and same Captain thing going on?

Capt. A: You have issues, that's just a coincidence!

?!: So it was a coincidence that you two ended up in the same bed? OHHHHWHEEE!!

C2: What is with you and yaoi and yuri? Have you no life?

?!: # 1- I'm a teen, this is my life, and # 2- same sex couples are way too fun an interesting, versus guy-girl relationships. Back to the rant.

?!: Capt. A or should I say , why are you such a cheater? And at the end, you always say somthing like "Justice prevails!" or "Victory!". One time, you flew off in the air and left me, when I could have beat you, and I lost!!

C2: Wow, that's a buck bruh...Or very weird glitch...

?!: And you! What are you? An actor or a singer? Or business man? You strip your clothes faster than Rouge. (must be a stripper-for-hire). If you want to sing/dance/strip go to the Love Planet or The Cat Scratch Club! Who are the rest of your freak goons! A baby shoots a rocket for chrissakes!

Capt. A: That is so not right, physically and every other way.

?!: Don't start with physical abilities beacause you guys float and fly and all types of impossible crap. Last of all...

C2 and Capt. A: Oh sht...

?!: You two still didn't admit that my statement was false, therefore you two are in fact boyfriend and boyfriend. L's Smart Stare Ho!

C2: I got this man. Listen, if it will make you shut up and go away, I'm in love with Captain America, we were fighting over uke that day, (man I love to fck him) and he loves me, now get lost.

?!:...But I live here.

Capt. A: Move it missy...

?! has left the building I don't want to, sing another love song babe.

C2: She gone?

Capt.A: I don't here Toni Braxton anymore...Now where were we?

C2: Sexual Seduction Stare Wanna see my new 'moves' and then maybe you'll let me 'fight' you.

Capt.A: Only if you'll 'shine' my 'shield' afterwards...

C2: Deal...Predator Chuckle

#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#

?!: I don't want to, hum another melody-Achoo! Hmmm, Sexy Time senses tingling!

#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#!#


	6. Intermission For Dummies

**INTERMISSION FOR DUMMIES!!!**

?!?: Hello! This is an intermission.

Abyss: **I think they read they figured that out already**.

?!?: How the hell _did_ you get in here? /Awkward…/

?!?: No, since tomorrow's Halloween, I'd thought I'd take the time to ask my fans (if any) should I continue.

Abyss: Are you serious? Who the hell reads your stuff- and like it!

?!?: Screw you too Abyss. Screw you too.

Abyss: Let's be reasonable- Fan writers are evil. Not my kind of evil, but a _totally different_, _**twisted**__ one._

?!?: Fur-get you, just for that, I'm gonna write even more!

Abyss: Noooooo, the torture, the humanity, the yaoi! **IT BURNSSS!!!!**

Usher: Let it burn, let it burn, gotta let it burn…

Abyss _(crying)_: Who the hell asked you!

Usher _(confused):_ Lol, I gets money fo' doin' this. (_starts dancing_)

Abyss: Must-Destroy-**EVIL RIPOFF!!!** (The hell, is he Sentinel?)

Usher: Head for the plains! (runs away)

?!?: You b^tch! Get back here and make your money! /I should of hired the girls from the Playa's Club!)

Abyss: That line is not your song! (he listens to Usher?)

Abyss: DIE!!! (chase after Usher)

?!?: There goes the neighborhood…


	7. Rant Show Episode 2: Read the Title

?!?: Me again, I know; you missed me as well, didn't you...Well I HAVE MORE RANTTTSSS!!!! YAY!

?!?: Don't worry, I'm still working on the segments.

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+

**Rant Episode 2**_: Flying Dragon and Tonic- End of Sanity_

Intro

?!?: Alright! C2 and Jin is an awesome team! *gettin it on fighting Colossus and Warmachine*

...Next Match...

?!?: Now whose butts am I gonna whip!?

C2(Captain Commando){I'm obssesed}

Jin Saotome(AGAIN!)

vs.

Ken(forever with red...)

Strider Hiryu(AWWW COME ON!!!)

while playing Boyz II Men-End of the Road

Guess What? I lost!!!!

End Intro

?!?: Today we will be brodcasting in front of a live audience!

**Crowd: HELLL YEAH!!! Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!!!**

_**?!?:**_ Any ways, our guest tonight is the Flying Dragon himself, Strider!

**Crowd: whooo! yeah! take it off! ZOMG!**

{perverted people}

_**?!?:**_ So Mr. Strider, you are here to tell a little something about... Your love life?

_**Strider:**_ Well, although it's none of your business,...it's not so good. Except for Morrigan, she just goes around raping people. *eye filled with brutal terror*

?!?: True, so what is with you and Jin?

**Crowd: wha-wha-wee-wha! go-on head chile! Oh yeah!**

{...Must I repeat myself?}

_**Strider**_: What are you getting at! I'm surrounded by babes all the time! *falters*

_**?!?:**_ I see. So answer this. Why are you constantly with him, and if you aren't, you kill the person that's on his team? And if by babes you mean baby-sitting.

_**Strider:**_ *fidgets in his chair* Well, I guess we are a good team, that's why. That's the problem with yaoi and yuri makers: Everything is taken at a hint of a relationship!

**Crowd: yeah crack pairings! strippers! hot tacos!**

{ hot tacos?}

_**?!?:**_ Well, let's see what our next guest has to say, Jin, come on out!

**Crowd: *cheers without weird comments***

**Jin: WHY AM I ON THIS RETARD RANT SHOW!!!**

_**?!?:**_ Get outta my ear yo! Anyhoo, we were on the subject of yaoi and yuri.

_**JIN:**_ WELL I THINK-

_**?!?:**_ Sorry, left the captions on.

_**Jin:**_ I was saying you dip, that yaoi and yuri(most of them) is terrible! I mean let's see if two people are best friends/partners. Especially for anime characters, it entirely destroy's that character's real personality. And plus they make guys pregnant! In that case, what is the whole reason for yaoi, just call me 'Jill'!

_**Strider:**_*super deep voice*: Yeah!

_**?!?:**_ So, okay, then how do you explain, Jill, that you only stripped when everyone else was defeated except Strider?

_**Jin(Jill):**_ That was a coincidence! *Animosity Gauge 45%*

_**Strider:**_ Ryu and Ken are great buds, why are you picking on us?

_**?!?:**_ Because-long story. I brung you two because you're making me lose! Jeez! Kiss and make up! Ken and Ryu did!

Backstage...

_**Megaman:**_ Hey Bonnie Baby! Do you here that noise, sounds like, bumping.

_**B.B:**_ Call me baby again, and you die...*ice ice baby*

Megaman: Sorry, but seriously, it sounds as if-

"Aaaaah! I wanna be seme Ken!"

...

_**B.B:**_ They don't pay me enough! *turns to walk out** sfx: CHA-CHING!!!*

_**B.B:**_ Hey, if we record them, don't you know how much of dough we'll be rolling?

Megaman: ZOMG! Let's do it!

?!?: Futhermore, I do believe that-...Where the hell did everyone go that fast, the audience too!?! *sounds of fighting outside* Eh!

Outside...(lmao)

?!?: What's with all the ruckus? Iceman, what are you doing here? I thought you hated my show?

Iceman:...Just checking it out.

?!?: Why is there a big line leading to Bonnie and Megaman? And where the hell did Strider and Jin r-u-n-n-o-f-t to?

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD

?!?: Class, what was today's moral lesson?

Dan: Uh, 12?

?!?: No. Now let's try to get answer from someone who isn't a complete retard.

Dan: No one else is here, everyone is out sick,

?!?: Well, then it's free day. Watcha wanna do?

Dan: Me and Gouki was gonna watch pron!

?!?:..Hmmmm! Otay!

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD


End file.
